When you get it…then what?

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achievements, Chasing Dreams, Dream Chasing, dreams, Happiness., In pursuit of happiness, life, Satisfaction

So it is no secret that in life we are constantly chasing after something; it might be that dream job, moving into that new apartment, getting a pay rise at work, getting a promotion, getting married, writing a book, flying an air plane .whatever it is, we all have dreams that we are chasing.  To put it another way, “we are all chasing dreams”, but when we get what we have been going after, then what?

Does it usually bring you the sort of satisfaction that you had imagined? Does it really really make you as happy as you dreamed it would? Did it really solve all of your problems just as you had hoped it would? Did it feel like you had finally found the one thing you had been waiting for to complete yourself or did you just go on to have another dream to chase after?

In other words, do we really find long-term happiness and satisfaction in the things that we chase after or is it just an endless pursuit of happiness?

Fight Back!

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Fight, Fight Back, Give up, Knock-out, life, Life is fair, Life is unfair, Quit, Why, Win

 

Time and time again, I hear people say stuff like “life is not fair”, “why does this always happen to me”, “you have no idea what I am going through”, I have tried over and over again but I never get it right”, “I am just going to throw in the towel”, “I give up”, “everyone else has an easier life than I do”.

By now, perhaps some of these phrases and sentences ring a bell; so is life really fair? The honest answer is “NO”, life isn’t fair; it never has been and never would be but are we going to throw a pity party every time life gets hard and we don’t get what we want?

I agree that so many times, we try really really hard, we give it all of our best and much more and it just still seems like we are not getting any closer to our dreams and then we pick ourselves up and try again, give it our best shot and it seems like it even gets worse and we try, try, and try again…

The question that begins to come to our mind sometimes is how long do I have to try? How long do I have to keep fighting for? How many times do I have to be rejected for that job before I stop trying?  How many times do I have to re-sit that exam? How long do I have to wait to reach my goal? How far? How long? How hard?

And the answer is, as long as you have breath in you, you have to keep fighting! As long as you have hope, don’t give up, as long as you have a dream, follow it! As long as you have an idea, build on it! As long as you are creative, keep at being innovative! As long as you can be diligent, keep working hard! Whatever you do just keep on keeping on!

When life throws you an unfair punch, then you need to hit back, it is OK to be startled for a little while to absorb what just happened but don’t stay down too long for it to be called out as a “wining knock-out”  against you.

Fight back with everything you have and all that is in you, that final punch just might be what you need to win; so when life hits hard at you, fight back!

The Joy is in the Journey

Sometimes when we achieve the things we strive for, we find they’re not very fulfilling. As we look back we realize that our greatest joy was not in the goal we reached, but in the growth we experienced on the way to it. Scientist Koichi Tanaka describes this phenomenon and how it can come about during the enjoyable pursuit of a dream. As he worked on trying to create an ion with lasers, he says: ‘I failed for weeks and months before I succeeded in making an ion’ why did I continue the experiment? Because I enjoyed it! It was fun for me to come to know something that I had never known before, and that fun enabled me to persist.’ That persistence helped him to win a Nobel Prize in chemistry. You have the potential to make many wonderful discoveries in life, and none greater than what you discover about God, and yourself. One leadership expert writes: ‘The pursuit of my dream has taken me out of my comfort zone, elevated my thinking, given me confidence, and confirmed my sense of purpose. My pursuit of the dream and my personal growth have become so intertwined that I now ask myself, Did I make the dream, or did the dream make me?’ When your mind accepts a new idea or learns a new truth, it’s forever changed. And once stretched, it takes on a new shape and never goes back to its original form. When that happens, you experience true fulfillment. No wonder children’s book author Elizabeth Coatsworth said,

‘When I dream, I am ageless.’

Credit: The UCB Word for Today 

The Road Less Travelled: Scary?

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asking this question, Choices, Comfort Zone, decisions, Different, different path, echoes, footprints, Journey, life, Norm, Path, People, Right, Road, Route, Scary, Travel, travelling the road, Walk, Wall, Wrong

Why do I do this to myself I always find myself asking, I have however found that asking this question over and over again never brings an answer but I still do anyway.

I find myself travelling the road less taken, I look back and can hear nothing but echoes, no footprints to follow, and no one to say “I think you are doing it right” or “I think you are doing it wrong” instead, all I can hear and find is people telling me what they think I should be doing because that is the way every other person does it or has done it.

I must admit that the road less travelled seems really scary sometimes and it does not help that I just keep jumping off these walls and finding myself travelling further and further away from the norm and my comfort zone.

At the end of the day, I want to be able to hopefully say that I did it a different way, I walked a different path, I tried a different route. It was not the norm but it got me much more than I ever expected and I am glad I travelled the road less taken.

“I wuz here”

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change, I was here, Impression, life, Make a difference

I remember when it was time to leave secondary school and we would all sign our names on the wall and it would go something like this “Tolu wuz here” or if you had a cool nickname, then it could go something like “Groovy chick wuz here”; the whole idea was to leave memories of ourselves imprinted on the school and all the new set of students for years and years to come. This was always the case year after year, of course not until a nosy teacher would come along and think we were making a mess of the walls and suggest that the walls needed fresh paint.

But for the time we had our names up there on the wall, we were satisfied with the fact that we had been there and we had signatures to show for it and people would see it, but then, how do we leave memories in the lives of people when we cannot use a signature on the wall? It is in the smile that says that you care, it is looking someone straight in the eye when no one else would, it is sharing your blessings with others, lending a helping hand, being that listening ear, lifting others when they are down, being that source of motivation, that source of encouragement, being that beam of light in the midst of it all, it is simply sharing your uniqueness with the world!

I don’t want my name just to be a signature on a brick wall, I would want my name imprinted in the hearts of the people I know and meet. I would like to know that the world is a little better just because I was here so I would live each day, taking every opportunity and hopefully, I can leave my mark in the world.

I think I would rather walk a mile in her shoes

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Content, Girls, Grateful, happy, life, Opinions, Pretty Shoes, Shoes, Walking, Walking a mile, Wants, Wishes

Walking a mile in my shoes

There is a saying that goes “He who wears the shoe knows where it hurts” and it sometimes holds true in our everyday lives; take it from a girl who has had episodes of walking in those really pretty high shoes even though they hurt.  What everyone could see on the outside were the pretty shoes; nobody ever knew how badly they hurt.

Walking a mile in my shoes; I stare at the girl with the really pretty pair of louboutin shoes and I think to myself what perfect life she must have. She probably has nothing to worry about, she looks like life has been completely fair to her and I decide all this within minutes simply by staring at her shoes! I begin to think to myself, I wouldn’t mind walking a mile in her shoes…

Walking a mile in my shoes; the young mother walks right by me looking so good with her husband by her side, he whispers something in her ears and she smiles and giggles. Aww, I think, such a cute couple and then just as I bend to pick up my car keys, I notice her shoes and they are just as cute as she is. They are Karen Millen and in kitten heels, they look so comfortable too. She is so perfect. I definitely wouldn’t mind walking in her shoes!

Walking a mile in my shoes; the pretty girl walks into the office for an interview, she has got long hair, schooled at Harvard, just got engaged, and just quit her job at JP Morgan. Her shoes are to die for!They are coffee brown, and go perfectly with her hand bag. I certainly want to walk a mile in this pair of shoes! I am positive it would feel so good…

I wait at the stairway by the waiting room, trying to decide between the healthy way and the elevator and then I look up through the transparent glass window that separates the two rooms and I cannot believe what is staring back at me!

It is the lady in the coffee brown shoes crying about something the doctor had just told her, it is the young mother having a huge fight with her husband with the kids trying to come between them, it is the girl in the louboutin shoes staring confused at a report that was just handed to her. All of a sudden, I realize that I am walking out of the building with none of that.

I stare at my old rugged shoes with no label and think to myself “just maybe walking in my shoes isn’t so bad after all”. I think I’d rather walk a mile in my shoes!

Walking a mile in someone else’s shoes only seems so attractive until the moment you try to swap it with yours and you realize how it does not fit and also how much it hurts!

Be content with what you have, be grateful for what you have got; I think I’d rather walk a mile in my shoes, do you?

Drinking from my saucer

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blessed, Blessings, Complaining, Content, life, Overflowing Blessings, Thankful

Received this today and thought to share, be blessed…

I’ve never made a fortune, and it’s probably too late now,
But I don’t worry about that much, I’m happy anyhow.
And as I go along life’s way I’m reaping better than I sowed.
I’m drinking from my saucer, because my cup has overflowed.

Haven’t got a lot of riches and sometimes the going’s tough
But I’ve got loving ones all around me, and that makes me rich enough.
I thank GOD for his Blessings and the Mercies He’s bestowed.
I’m drinking from my saucer, because my cup has overflowed.

I remember times when things went wrong, my faith wore somewhat thin.
But all at once the dark clouds broke, and the sun peeped through again.
So LORD, help me not to gripe about the tough rows I have hoed.
I’m drinking from my saucer, because my cup has overflowed.

If GOD gives me strength and courage when the way grows steep and rough,
I’ll not ask for other blessings, I’m already blessed enough.
And may I never be too busy, to help others bear their loads..
Then I’ll keep drinking from my saucer, because my cup has overflowed.

When I think of how many people in this world have it worse than I do,
I realize just how BLESSED WE really are.

Credit: John Paul Moore

Life lessons from a lateral trainer machine

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Analyze, Complex, Exercise, Lessons, life, Life Lessons, Simple

The simplicity of certain things in life often makes us wonder about it for much longer than we actually really should. In the simple, we assume the complex and practically drag ourselves through the situation.

Sometimes, when all life is offering us is the simple, we make it more complex by looking for more and thinking there has to be more to this than the eyes can see, it cannot really be this simple, it cannot be! And then we search and search until we wear ourselves out…so going back to the illustration of the lateral trainer.

I got off work really early and decided to stop by the gym before heading home; I had just discovered this gym round the corner from my house that has the lateral trainer which I had never used before and I was really excited about it.

On my first work-out on, I restricted my resistance to work out level 1 which I realized was a bit stiff but I got comfortable and stuck with it. On my second visit, I wasted absolutely no time going back to work-out level 1 as I had gotten used to this movement & resistance level however, after twenty minutes, I realized that the machine automatically started adjusting itself and moved me up to work-out level 5; hmm I thought, wait a minute! I was just on level 1 which ordinarily should be the easiest level, why take me up to level 5 and make life harder for me? Although I noticed the movement became swifter, and seemed easier, I thought to myself that there had to be something wrong with the machine. Why would level 5 move easier than level 1? It should be the other way around, maybe the connection cord is broken or loose? Something has definitely gone wrong.

I thought about drawing the attention of the gym instructor but I later decided against it; I simply took it back down to level 1 and continued my work out.

Five minutes later, the same thing happened; without thinking much about it, I quickly took it back down to level 1 again, with the movement getting less swift but I still thought to myself – level 1 should be easier than level 5 logically, I feel comfortable with level 1, I don’t know why this machine has developed a mind of its own so I am going to stick to what I know. There has to be something wrong with this machine I thought!

And another 5 minutes into my work-out, the same thing happens again; I find the level going up to 5, but this time while looking at the dashboard trying to diagnose the disease this machine had contacted all of a sudden, making it act irrationally and out of control, I realized that my movements became swifter, my legs went higher and farther, I felt like I was floating, I felt like I was skating or skiing: this feels good I thought and then I look at the dashboard and a light comes up saying – “raise your knees high up and begin to float” – and I had the “Ah moment”, so this is exactly how this piece of equipment is supposed to work.

I had spent about thirty minutes of my time struggling with this machine, over-analyzing the situation and thinking something was wrong, not allowing this piece of equipment to work exactly how it was built to work.

So next time you are tempted to over-analyze a situation, or think of something as more complex than it presents itself – just let it be, that might be all you need to start floating.

Things to think about

Tags

Everyday Living, life

In a university commencement address several years ago, Brian Dyson, CEO of Coca Cola Enterprises, spoke of the relation of work to one’s other commitments: “Imagine life as a game in which you are juggling some five balls in the air. You name them; work, family, health, friends and spirit – and you’re keeping all of these in the air. You will soon understand that work is a rubber ball. If you drop it, it will bounce back. But the other four balls – family, health, friends and spirit – are made of glass. If you drop one of these, they will be irrevocably scuffed, marked, nicked, damaged or even shattered. They will never be the same. You must understand that and strive for balance in your life.” How? Don’t undermine your worth by comparing yourself with others; it is because we are different that each of us is special. Don’t set your goals by what other people deem important; only you know what is best for you. Don’t take for granted the things closest to your heart; cling to them as they were your life. Don’t let your life slip through your fingers by living in the past or for the future. By living your life one day at a time, you live ALL the days of your life. Don’t give up when you still have something to give; nothing is really over until the moment you stop trying. Don’t be afraid to admit that you are less than perfect; it is this fragile thread that binds us to each other. Don’t be afraid to encounter risks; it is by taking chances that we learn how to be brave. Don’t shut love out of your life by saying it’s impossible to find. The quickest way to receive love is to give it; the fastest way to lose love is to hold it too tightly; and the best way to keep love is to give it wings. Don’t run through life so fast that you forget not only where you’ve been, but also where you are going. Don’t forget, a person’s greatest emotional need is to feel appreciated. Don’t be afraid to learn. Knowledge is weightless, a treasure you can always carry easily. Don’t use time or words carelessly. Neither can be retrieved. Life is not a race, but a journey to be savoured each step of the way.

 

Credit: GodVine

What I wish someone had said to me at my graduation ceremony

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Boot camp, Candy Store, Expectations, Graduation, Leaving School, Plans, Reality Bites, The Real World, University

Reality Bites! A Speech to the Graduating Class of 2000

I welcome you all to the first day of the rest of your lives, I would make this brief and to the point as I know you have all waited anxiously for this moment for many years and I have no plans to shield you away from reality for any moment longer.

The Expectation:

The great joy of graduating from the university; you feel excited and overjoyed to have made it through those demanding years and then you feel like the whole world out there should be waiting for you…you have very high expectations:

• Leave school – get a good job – love your job – have a fabulous life…
• Leave school with good grades – get a great job – get promoted every year – have job satisfaction…
• Leave school with top grades – get a master’s degree – get a fantastic paying job – get married – have kids…

We usually have it all planned out until reality bites!

Reality:

For a lucky few, things would work out exactly as planned but for others; things may not necessarily work out like that:

• Good grades do not always mean the best postgraduate school
• Great grades does not always mean a good job
• Great grades does not always mean job satisfaction
• Excelling in school does not always translate to a great post-grad life

So you might be thinking – how do I bridge this gap between my expectations and reality? Here are a few tips:

• Approach your post-grad life with an open mind
• Have all your dreams, goals, and objectives but don’t put yourself in a box – it can lead to disappointments
• Think smart and work smart
• Speak to other people who have been there and gone through it
• Don’t give up – no matter how hard or impossible things seem to get
• If you really want something, go for it – never take no for an answer
• If and when you fall, pick yourself up – never stay down, you learn a lot when you fall
• Life is a learning curve, you never stop learning so don’t get mad at yourself when you don’t know, just learn, and keep moving because the next new thing to learn is probably just around the corner.

Finally real life is not like a trip to the candy store where everything is nice-looking and sweet – in real life, you constantly have to work hard, rise above situations, jump hurdles, break bridges and build bridges, have highs, have lows, have celebrations, disappointments, joy, happiness (real life is a mixed bag)…don’t go into the real world with the mind-set of visiting a candy store.

However, whatever the case maybe, real life experiences would only help to build your character, make you stronger, reveal to you qualities you never knew you possessed, & help you push boundaries.

The End

In the end, you would all achieve an objective, whether it is one you have mapped out already, one you have not even imagined, one that crept up on you or one that you gradually came to realize…In the end, you would have done something.

I wish someone had told me all of these at my graduation ceremony instead of just buying me presents and congratulating me – Welcome to the real world!